Ranker.com - List it. Rank it. Love it. * Signup * Login * Login via Facebook * Login via Twitter Create a List ____________________ GO Browse Categories Home * Browse * Popular * All Time * Vote Lists * best of 2011 * Film * People * TV * Music * funny * Games * Sports * Places/Travel * babes * Food/Drink * offbeat * Cars * Listopedia * Politics & History * Education * Books * Tech * Arts * sexy * Business * Comics * Science < > * share this list * * * * * * * * * * Email The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme Anything The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme By Robert Wabash [50 more lists] more Anti-Joke Chicken is an Advice Animal meme that takes the setups to jokes and then explains them literally, which would usually kill the laughter in any room, but coming out of such a militant, humorless looking chicken, every one of the chicken's joke failures comes across as hilarious. So get ready for rational explanations or humorless answers to jokes that could probably be otherwise good. Here is the best of Anti-Joke Chicken, in all her joke-ruining glory. Nothing less/more satisfying than good anti-jokes. Make a Version Info View 53 Views: 280142 Items: 5 Robert Wabash By Robert Wabash 5Items 280,142Views Tags: funny, best of, Meme, memes Name 1. Who is Anti-Joke Chicken? Anti-Joke Chicken is the latest animal advice meme to come out of Reddit and it hits home for a lot of people, because Anti-Joke Chicken is that person we all know that either can't tell a joke, or always needs to point out the grain of truth in the joke -- even though everyone around them is completely aware of what that grain of truth is, as that grain of truth is usually the joke, or why the joke is funny to begin with. Originally taken from a picture of a chicken that looks, admittedly, humorless... ... Anti-Joke chicken takes every joke literally, so most Anti-Joke Chicken memes will either tell an "anti-joke" (a joke that is funny because it's written or delivered so poorly) or they'll behave like this: [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u51.jpg] Anti-Joke Chicken, for the most part, takes what will most likely be a classic joke of some kind and then botches it by taking the setup literally, which is usually a huge record-scratch moment in real life, but attached to a chicken's face that looks like she means business, the complete failure of the joke itself becomes hilarious. Here's the best of the Anti-Joke Chicken meme. + 0 2. [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u50.jpg] [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u4.jpg] [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u5.jpg] [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u6.jpg] [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u7.jpg] [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u8.jpg] [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u9.jpg] + 0 3. 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[anti-joke-chicken-photo-u38.jpg] [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u39.jpg] [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u40.jpg] [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u41.jpg] [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u42.jpg] [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u43.jpg] [anti-joke-chicken-photo-u49.jpg] + 0 More Lists * [the-very-best-of-the-paranoid-parrot-meme.jpg?version=132841715800 0] vote on this The Very Best of the Paranoid Parrot Meme by LaurieM * [the-best-of-the-raptor-jesus-meme.jpg?version=1310065091000] The Absolute Best of the Raptor Jesus Meme by Brian Gilmore * [ranker_ajax-loader_100.gif] 10 People Who Actually Have Internet Meme Tattoos by Tat Fancy Post a Comment Login Via: Facebook Twitter Yahoo! Google my comment is about [The List_________________] Write your comment__________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________ Name or Login : ____________________ Get a new challenge Get an audio challenge Help Incorrect please try again Enter Funny Words He Post! Show Comments About: [The List] 1. jvgjyhhvbyiuv The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/25/2011 10:13 AM The fourth one from the bottom is scientifically incorrect. Mass does not effect falling rate. :I reply 1. manuelnas manuelnas The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 1/17/2012 2:37 PM what about the height the plane is at? i mean if it's standing on the ground they could break their legs or something. But death is quite exaggerated... reply 1. Science The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/25/2011 12:41 PM It does when terminal velocity comes into play, so the denser one would fall faster. -_- reply 1. Nigahiga The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 7/11/2011 1:48 AM TEEHEE reply 1. fkhgkf The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/25/2011 10:57 AM Weight affects the terminal velocity though. So a heavier person wouldn't fall faster to begin with, but would accelerate for longer, therefore hitting the ground first. reply 1. ate chicken The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 3/03/2011 2:20 PM body weight is in relation with size and bigger size makes bigger wind resistance and we don't know wether their fall is long enough to reach the terminal velocity reply 1. Iggy The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/26/2011 7:51 AM The last three exchanges vis a vis the falling rate of the bodies fully illustrates the point made by Our Humorless Chicken, don't ya think? reply 2. blah The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 7/23/2011 10:47 PM me to reply 3. HA HA POOP The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/25/2011 10:43 AM True, but their physical size would influence their wind resistance while falling. reply 4. I love you The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 6/02/2011 9:07 AM I've learned so much about gravity and science from these posts that I no longer have to take any science-related courses in college :D reply 5. Susu Susu The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 1/20/2012 12:38 PM Guy gets crabs after sleeping with a girl. Boils them to make her dinner because he respects and appreciates her. reply 6. Arrogant Bastard The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/17/2011 10:31 PM The set up:\n\nBarack Obama, the Pope, and a Boy Scout are on a private flight. The pilot runs out of the cockpit and says "The plane is going to crash. There are only 3 parachutes, and I have to use one so I can the FAA what happened." The pilot puts on one of the chutes and dives out of the plane.\n\nBarack Obama turns to the Pope and the Boy Scout and says "I'm the leader of the free world and the smartest president in the history of the United States, so I must survive." He throws on a pack and dives out of the plane.\n\nThe Pope turns to the boy scout and says "Son, I've lived a long and fulfilling life. You take the last parachute and save yourself."\n\nThe boy scout replies "No problem, Mr. Pope. There are still 2 parachutes left. President Obama just jumped out of the plane with my knapsack." \n\nChicken: Because Barack is actually an idiot. reply 1. noranud noranud The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 7/14/2011 8:52 AM the pope probably stayed in the plane so he could molest the boy scout! reply 7. chickenfan The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/17/2011 11:49 AM I like the anti-joke chicken. It's smart and answers rationally. And it speaks out against racist and sexist stereotypes :> reply 8. lololol The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/26/2011 7:35 PM http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XJcZ-KoL9o reply 9. acuity12 acuity12 The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 8/11/2011 6:06 PM Haha nice... superb list. You guys can make your own anti-joke chickens at imgflip.com/memegen/anti-joke-chicken reply 10. shutup The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/27/2011 3:49 PM not funny, but gay at least reply 11. bill The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/25/2011 6:51 PM and the grammar is proper shart too i could tell and i'm quite dyslexic reply 12. Amazeballs The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 6/16/2011 5:42 PM My eyes are tearing from laughing so much reply 13. Scientist The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/27/2011 8:32 AM The one regarding jumping out of an airplane is false. Everyone knows that weight and mass have no bearing on the velocity a moving body has when pulled by gravity. That chicken is retarded. reply 1. Guy Who Understands Physics The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/27/2011 10:02 AM I'm guessing you've gone to a low level physics class and did trajectory and gravity equations solved some problems did some lectures, understood it. I'm also guessing that you never got to anything involving air friction and how weight, surface area, and even shape play a role in determining falling long distances. If you got a feather and a small metal bead that had the same mass which would fall faster? the bead, although if they were both beads or if it was in a vacuum they would fall the same. So I'm hoping you can figure out how two people could fall differently if there are differences between them. reply 1. Awesome The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 3/16/2011 10:51 AM Guy who understands Physics = Win reply 1. Guy who hates lying chickens The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/27/2011 8:11 PM Scientist: Winner Guy Who Understands Physics: Loser But the first person loses because they were writing on the grounds of what everyone knows, yet used the word "retarded" as their go-to burn. Yet the second person loses even more, because they were writing on the grounds of understanding physics. Which is completely lame and unnecessary grounds by which to critique a joke. Basically, anyone who would even bother writing on this topic has too much time on their hands, or simply can not understand the point of jokes. [it is highly unlikely that the misleading representation of physics present in that joke was going to have any repercussions in the scientific community] There you have it, an ironically, and exponentially long critique of some dork's paragraph long critique of some other dork's few sentence long critique of some random person's sentence long critique of the overdone territory of blonde jokes. The End. reply 1. TurboFool The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/28/2011 11:10 PM Runner-up loser: guy who doesn't understand that Guy Who Understands Physics was defending the joke against Scientist and not critiquing it. reply 1. Mr slufy The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 3/03/2011 10:44 PM You're all losers. The chicken wins. It's a talking chicken, I mean, come on. reply 1. Zombie Kid The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 3/27/2011 8:26 PM I like turtles reply 1. Afghanistan Banana Stand The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/01/2011 8:44 AM Zombie Kid=Winner reply 1. ziggerknot The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/01/2011 11:09 PM everyone knows the real winner is charlie sheen reply 1. That One Mexican The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/04/2011 9:44 PM Everyone Knows Chuck Norris Always Wins. reply 1. Chuck Norris The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/09/2011 10:15 PM Everyone knows mexicans have no rights reply 1. That other Mexican The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 6/08/2011 4:19 PM we are too busy fucing your women reply 1. gangstar The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/10/2011 5:49 AM $17, wait what? reply 1. digglet The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/10/2011 3:41 PM I poop too much reply 1. Mewtwo The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/14/2011 10:21 AM Everyone knows Digglet is a c**p pokemon reply 1. ash ketchum The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/17/2011 4:06 AM hey im ash ketchum pokemon trainer, reply 1. professor oak The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/17/2011 2:36 PM im oak i had sex with ashes mom reply 1. Ashes Mom The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/22/2011 11:17 AM and i loved it. reply 1. The Combo Breaker The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/22/2011 12:35 PM C-C-C-C-C-COMBOBREAKER reply 1. Your Mother The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 6/02/2011 9:04 AM You children go on some weird websites... reply 1. Darth Vader The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 6/05/2011 5:48 PM DO NOT WANT reply 1. DA CHICKEN The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 6/14/2011 12:35 PM bump penis gay s**t reply 1. Optimus Prime The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 6/14/2011 10:16 PM Dolphins are a threat to the human race reply 1. Confused The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 6/28/2011 2:54 PM Why were people talking about physics on a web page for the Anti-Joke Chicken Meme? reply 1. SammYam The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 7/05/2011 9:31 PM i like pie reply 1. somalian pirate The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 7/22/2011 2:50 PM i bet a single guy posted all this and he is schizophrenic reply 14. Patrick The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 11/08/2011 6:38 PM It wouldn't matter what their weights were if a blonde and a brunette jumped out of a plane. All objects undergo acceleration at 32.2 ft/s^2 in a free fall. However, it might matter what their relative surface areas were, because the frictional force might play a part in determining who hits the ground first. They also would not die for certain. There are numerous instances of people falling out of planes and surviving incredible falls. reply 1. Anonymous The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 1/26/2012 4:36 AM Actually it would due to terminal velocity Vt=√(2mg/ρACd), where m is the mass reply 15. whatever The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 9/02/2011 5:08 PM i love anti joke chicken reply 16. jotor The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/27/2011 8:23 AM Horrible.. reply 17. Some Broad The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/06/2011 10:14 PM I don't give a s**t what you guys think, I laughed my ass off. reply 18. That guy The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 9/11/2011 6:27 AM anyone else read these like an angry black man? reply 19. Nevermind The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 2/28/2011 2:42 AM leave the body-less chicken and blonde-science alone! It's a JOKE people! reply 20. Porkas The Absolute Best of The Anti-Joke Chicken Meme at 5/12/2011 7:14 AM Oh, I still can't catch my breath. 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