+ Free Issue of Forbes

Dealing With Your Mother-In-Law (And Your Parents): When Seniors Become
Dependents

--
     * (BUTTON) Share to linkedin

   Today is Mother-in-Law's Day. The day, created by the editor of a local
   newspaper in Amarillo, Texas, was first held on March 5, 1934, but was
   eventually moved to the fourth Sunday in October (insert random
   Halloween witch joke here).

   Mothers-in-law don't always have the best reputation. Many
   mother-in-law relationships are notoriously difficult, such as Ralph
   Kramden's relationship with his own mother-in-law on "The
   Honeymooners":

--
     hates me, Alice!

   Lucky for me, my mother-in-law doesn't hate me. And I don't hate her.
   We get along just great.

   In fact, as she grows older, my husband and I have been discussing the
   idea of her moving in with us (my father-in-law passed away last year).
   This isn't novel. More families like mine are contemplating the best
   way to deal with aging parents, especially following the death of one
--
   and kidnapped children.

   But what about your parents or your in-laws? If you take care of a
   parent or in-law, you may be also to claim that person as a dependent
   as a qualifying relative. A person is your qualifying relative if that
   person meets all of these tests:
--
       stepmother; a son or daughter of your brother or sister; a son or
       daughter of your half brother or half sister; a brother or sister
       of your father or mother; or one of your in-laws (including your
       son-in-law, daughter-in-law, father-in-law, mother-in-law,
       brother-in-law, or sister-in-law).
     * Gross income test. To meet this test, a person's gross income for
       the year must be less than $4,000. Gross income is all income in
--
   determining whether a person might be a qualifying child, there is no
   age test for a qualifying relative. A qualifying relative can be any
   age - so yes, your older mother-in-law or parent would count so long as
   he or she meets the other criteria.

   And no need to read through the piece again: residency is not a
   requirement to claim a dependent for a parent or in-law. Your parent,
   in-law or other qualifying relative doesn’t actually have to live with
   you: he or she can live in his or her own home, a nursing home or an
   assistance living facility. So even if you can't live with your
   mother-in-law but you're still taking care of her, you may still get a
   tax break.

   If your parent or in-law meets the dependency tests, you can deduct a
   personal exemption amount for him or her on your own taxes. The
   exemption amount reduces your taxable income: the more dependents, the
--
   click here.)

   If your parent or in-law meets the dependency test, you can also deduct
   any medical expenses that you pay on his or her behalf. Remember,
   however, that you must itemize to claim medical expenses. Additionally,
--
   help you qualify for the deduction.

   Even if your parent or in-law does not meet the dependency test, you
   may still be able to deduct those medical expenses that you pay on his
   or her behalf. For purposes of the medical expenses deduction, you can
--
   claimed as a dependent on someone else's return.

   If your parent or in-law requires additional care, you may also be able
   to claim the child and dependent care credit. The credit is available
   to eligible taxpayers who pay expenses for the care of a qualifying
   individual while you work (or while you look for work). A qualifying
   individual includes a parent or in-law so long as the person is
   physically or mentally incapable of self-care (that includes caring for
   his or her hygiene or nutritional needs), has lived with you for at
--
   There may be other tax breaks available, too, depending on the kind of
   assistance (such as paying for college) that you're providing for a
   parent or an in-law. You don't have to live with your parents or
   in-laws in order to help out. Depending on how much assistance you're
   providing, that could translate into a tax break (or two) for you and
   your family. Be sure to ask your tax professional for more information.
--
   Kelly Phillips Erb

   Years ago, I found myself sitting in law school in Moot Court wearing
   an oversized itchy blue suit. It was a horrible experience. In a
   desperate attempt to avoid anythi